When my mind go into writing mode, I think about life and situations that can occur of have. In doing that one day I began to write:
My poetry's truths:
(Son) I'm sitting behind this glass looking at you and I wanna know...why didn't you tell me?
(Mom) Tell you what?
(Son) The truth.
(Mom) About?
(Son) The truth about love and the truth about anger and the truth about feelings and the truth about consequences. I wanna know.
(Mother) How could you expect me to? My mother nor father never taught me.
(Son) You showed me that it was okay for a man to hit a woman becos she forgives. You showed me that a man could stay out all nite and make outside kids becos she forgives. You showed me that no matter the wrong I do to her, I would always be right becos she forgives. Well she didn't forgive me like you forgave his.
(Mother) Son...
(Son) See, I love you and you were my role model. What you did and what you showed me...I followed. You are my mother and I expected that you would cause me no harm but you did. Cos look where I am...in prison as a seventeen year old kid.
(Mother) And you blame me?
(Son) Shouldn't I?
(Mother) No, you shouldn't.
(Son) I shouldn't. Tell me mother cos I wanna know why.
(Mother) Blame my mother cos she was the one who raised me. She showed me that violence was to occur often and to forgive was how it was suppose to be. Blame my father cos he was so irate, got so mad one day and punched me in the face. Blame your grandparents cos they were the one's who raised them.
(Son) You are my mother so you were to guide and protect me. You were suppose to put a stop to that cycle from the moment that you had me. You were suppose to show me how to be strong and that hitting a woman was wrong. You were suppose to show me that a man is not a woman's everything but you didn't. You allowed me to watch a man disrespect you by cheating and hitting. (Mother) I'm sorry.
(Son) But do you understand what I'm saying.
(Mother) I get it.
(Son) Do you really?
(Mother) I do.
(Son) So what does this mean for my six year old sister who's looking up to you?
(Mother) I...I'm gonna stand up for myself. I'm gonna leave him.
(Son) You say that.
(Mother) And I mean it. I see how much it has hurt you and the suffering that my loving him has been bringing.
(Son) I love you mom and I don't want you to ever go through that again.
(Mother) I know.
(Son) I want my sister to learn to be the person we never were. I want her to have a safe life and to know that you care. You are beautiful mom and deserve someone who's gonna love you in a way that puts a smile on your face and warms your hurt. No more blaming others . No more. Just stand up and do what you know you got to, not only for my sister but for yourself. You get the second chance that I don't and my girlfriend didn't. If I could turn back the hands of time, I would. If I could only take back the abuse, the things I said to her, the nights I left her alone and the ways that I was completely disrespectful...I would do it.
(Mother) I know. Well, our time is up and I have to go. -put hers hand on the window-
(Son) I love you. See you next week.
**Only he sat and waited cos home she went and she drifted off to death's sleep. Only after taking pills to kill the pain in her heart. Only after praying and asking forgiveness from God. Only after dropping off her daughter at her cousins to play. Only after she whispered, "I hope my son will find it in his heart to truly forgive me one day.**
(Written by Leukemiona Kelley, 2013)
No comments:
Post a Comment